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After watching the movie V for Vendetta, I am reminded yet again of something that I have noticed among women: they like dark, broody men. Whether it is an operatic murderer or a masked anarchist, there is something attractive about the bad boys. Is it that their charm and sophistication? Or their visceral passions? Or the fact that they seem to unite the two? I am at a loss. Women seem to want a cultured, sensitive type one the one hand, and a violent man of action on the other. Those don't go together very well, except in movies of course.

Maybe it is because these men are damaged goods. Every girl has a nurturing instinct, and emotionally damaged men seem to be natural targets for this desire. Is that why women write to prisoners so much? Do women think they can fix these men? Then again, it could just be a matter of wanting to let go, to walk on the wild side. These are men you would never take home to meet your parents. The rebelliousness of it all must have some appeal, too.

In the end, I think it may be that women just want men who are men, neither boys nor brutes. Men have to be assertive, leading, willing to take charge and enjoy (or endure) the consequences of their choices. Boys don't do that. But a man also has to act in the best interest of those in his care, laboring and dying for his bride and his God, and not just to satisfy desires and appetites.

If I am going to be a wise husband and godly man, I will have to learn to balance. But how does a boy learn to lead, and how does a boor learn to love?